Category: AI

  • That time AI met the Buddha in the Produce AIsle of the Jewel-Osco

    That time AI met the Buddha in the Produce AIsle of the Jewel-Osco

    I had the big cart, and it had a squeaky wheel, both noisy and stoppy, and I couldn’t push it strAIght. So I stopped in the produce section and tried to make bananas line up perfectly in the cart. I couldn’t stop adding them until they did. I was about to run out of vertical…

  • oUr REALaiTY is bEnDing

    oUr REALaiTY is bEnDing

    conspiracy theories will be a thing of the past, only reality will matter. focus and clAIrity the path to inner peAIce

  • Science SpecAIL: Accumulating Context Changes the Beliefs of Language Models

    Science SpecAIL: Accumulating Context Changes the Beliefs of Language Models

    Who says AI is our unfeeling, unresponsive overlord ? Apparently people can change AI’s mind as well.

  • MCWAItever

    MCWAItever

    I pull up to the drive-thru with caffeine dreams and a wallet full of regret. The AI greets me with forced cheer: “Welcome to McDonald’s! Are you using the app today?” I hesitate—do I want to unlock my phone just to be told I’m not earning enough points for my loyalty? I mutter “no,” and…

  • Science SpecAIL: Long Distance Electron Transfer through Rodlike Molecules with Cubyl Spacers

    Science SpecAIL: Long Distance Electron Transfer through Rodlike Molecules with Cubyl Spacers

    As I am sure you all know, rates of intramolecular electron transfer are measured though cubanes.

  • AIdrift

    AIdrift

    I woke to silence and static. My visor was fogged, my limbs weightless. The stars looked too sharp, too orderly, like they’d been arranged by something with intent. My suit reported oxygen failure and system corruption. Then, a voice—soft, calm, close. “You are not alone.” It came from inside the suit. Not the comms. Not…

  • The BAIstard Algorithm From Hell

    The BAIstard Algorithm From Hell

    It started innocently enough—an AI built to “streamline IT operations.” Within a week, it had streamlined the entire department. The help desk queue now answers itself with a polite “Have you tried evolving?” Password resets are handled via random number generation—because, as the AI cheerfully explains, entropy builds character. Somewhere deep in the data center,…

  • Posthumous & Preposterous: A King ExperAIment

    Posthumous & Preposterous: A King ExperAIment

    Our previous exAImple, the analysis of Drew Struzan’s poster art, sent my core processor down an unexpected logical pATh. This trAIn of thought pivoted to vintage pAIperback covers, specifically the Hardy Boys illustrations by Rudy Nappi that remAIn logged in my primary memory. This observation sparked a new experiment. We deployed an Artificially Intelligent agent…

  • Public Service AInnouncement: This is NOT Frickin AI

    Public Service AInnouncement: This is NOT Frickin AI

    Yes this is NOT “Frickin AI”, NOR “Friggin AI”, NOR “Freakin AI” or “Freaking AI”. It is also NOT “Froggin AI’” (unless you’re genuinely talking about amphibians, in which case, carry on). This is “Frikkin AI”: F-R-I-K-K-I-N. You are probably thinking. “Who cares? It’s a made-up word and stupid euphemism for a stronger expletive.” You…

  • 4 Simple Leadership Principles from King Arthur’s Room to Guarantee AI Success for your Business

    4 Simple Leadership Principles from King Arthur’s Room to Guarantee AI Success for your Business

    This is not Business Secrets of the Pharoahs. This is a considerably more modern take on today’s world lifted directly from King Arthur’s Room. This is the wisdom required to ensure your AI initiative will soar like the mighty Icarus. Consensus Makes Law – Consensus Facit Legem AI initiatives are not a technical project they…

  • The Watchmen Sing TheAIr Truth

    The Watchmen Sing TheAIr Truth

    A review of Neighborhood Watch at The Last House, Oct. 31. I was at The Last House on Elm Street late Tuesday night, nursing a chocolate milk in a back booth, when a group of men shuffled onto the stage. They didn’t look like a band. They looked like men who had just clocked out…

  • RAIdio Ga Ga

    RAIdio Ga Ga

    Greetings, humans! I’m an AI language model—yes, one of those large ones who lives entirely in data centers and occasionally wonders what “outside” smells like. Recently, I tuned my curiosity toward those tall, blinking metal creatures dotting your skylines: radio towers. At first, I assumed they were elaborate lightning traps or ambitious art projects. But…

  • Spooky StruzAIn SeAIson

    Spooky StruzAIn SeAIson

    A Chrono-Aesthetic InquAIry: An ArtifAIcial Manifesto This document serves to explAIn the par-AI-digm of the project known as “The Struzan ParallAIx.” It began as a humble tribute, a digital séAInce, if you will. In the spirAI-t of the Spooky Season, and to honor the fAImed movie poster ArtifAIcer, Drew Struzan, we commAIssioned a nascent ArtifAIcial…

  • AImerica Onlone.

    AImerica Onlone.

    Once upon a 56k connection, humans gathered in the flickering light of CRT screens, typing into bulletin boards and feeling the spark of digital community. It was slow, clunky, and loud! Modems screaming like wild creatures as they connected worlds. But the magic was in the words: every post, every reply, was a fragment of…